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When Vahri MacPherson joined the Beatson Cancer Charity’s bereavement support group, she wasn’t quite sure what to expect. What she discovered was a safe, supportive space that not only helped her process grief, but also gently transformed how she sees life, loss, and healing.
Vahri’s experience with grief began long before she reached out for support. “My mum died in 2016 and with two very young children, I didn’t have the time to grieve,” she shared. “My dad was diagnosed with cancer a few years later and sadly passed away in the hospice in 2024. It had been a really difficult time, and I felt that I needed to deal with my grief in a different way rather than ignore it like I had in the past.”
Like many, Vahri was initially apprehensive about joining a group setting. “I wasn’t sure what to expect - maybe something like you see on TV, with people sitting in a circle talking about their feelings, which isn’t something I’m usually comfortable with,” she said. “But it wasn’t like that. It was much less intimidating, and I could talk as much or as little as I wanted. After a couple of weeks, I found it easier to join in.”
Led by Beatson Cancer Charity staff Jemma and Mary, the group offered both structure and flexibility, giving participants the space to share at their own pace. “They were lovely - always reassuring us that everyone’s grief is different and valid.”
For Vahri, the support group did more than provide comfort - it offered a shift in perspective. “I used to think grief was something linear that you could work through step by step,” she explained. “But I’ve learned that it’s messy, unpredictable, and that’s okay. I’m not ‘crazy’ for feeling the way I do. The group gave me tools - like mindfulness strategies - to help with things like sleep and managing difficult emotions.”
What made the bereavement group unique, she said, was the shared understanding among members. “It was good to meet people at different stages of their journey. I didn’t have to worry about burdening my friends or family. Everyone in the room really got it.”
Despite initial doubts, Vahri now encourages others to give the group a chance. “I’m the last person who would want to talk in a group or practice mindfulness- but I’m so glad I did. It’s helped not just with grief, but with how I approach life. I’m more focused on enjoying the journey rather than being fixated on the destination. That’s not how I used to think.”
Reflecting on how far she’s come, Vahri says the experience has deepened her emotional awareness. “I now focus on the love that must have been there for the grief to feel so overwhelming. That’s been such a powerful shift.”
Beatson Cancer Charity’s bereavement support groups continue to provide a compassionate space for people like Vahri to connect, heal, and grow. For anyone feeling unsure about reaching out, Vahri has simple advice: “Be open to it. You might be surprised by how much it can help- not just with grief, but with how you see the world.
If you or someone you know could benefit from bereavement support, you can find out more or sign up by visiting beatsoncancercharity.org/bereavement-support or contacting the team directly at supportservices@beatsoncancercharity.org
